“Romancing” Romance.

From killerfictionwriters.blogspot.com

Romance is the glamour which turns the dust of everyday life into a golden haze.” ~ Amanda Cross

Ahhh yes, “the dust of everyday life”..or as I call it “the routine.” There are some things I love about routine…the predictability, the scheduling, planning the knowing what is going to happen, when it’s going to happen, for the most part. However, this practical side of me is also sometimes at war with the romantic side of me.  Not the romance novel kind of romance, but everyday romance. Small gestures, sweet kisses, a soft breath as we fall asleep side by side.

Sometimes, routine meets romance in the middle. The early hours of the morning, and I do mean early, like 3:30 am early, when E is crying and KSP gets up to get her and carries her in over his shoulder as she radiates like the sun that she is now with us in her “happier place.”

The moment when he feeds her at 5 am with his hair a mess so I can lay back down, for even a few minutes of extra pretend dozing.  The moments of quiet when noone knows I am watching. When KSP plays guitar with the kids while Q bobs his head back and forth, blond curls bouncing, and E scoots closer with her new found mobility extending to touch the guitar that dada is playing.

E and Dada on Guitar

A different kind of romance.

But, I am a sucker for romance of the movie kind as well. The dinners, the conversation, the wine, the flirting, and the anticipation of what could be.  I love that romance too.

Last Saturday in the spirit of romance, KSP and I had a mini date night at home.

We decided to celebrate KSP’s new job, which we are both very excited about. We made dinner, we opened a nice bottle of wine, we turned off the TV.  We laughed. We talked of possibilities and future. We decided we would have nice bath.

We lit candles, brought back wine and slid into our new tub.   As we talked more, suddenly, 2 white paws perched themselves next to my head.

Then a small gray and white head popped up. Sniffing.  Purring. Trying to figure out just how he could get on my shoulder to take a nap. It was our toddler cat, Max.

Until the minis came home, Max was my baby. He slept in my hair, on my head, every night for 3 years. And then his world turned upside down. Our romantic mommy/kitty time had come to an end. Mommy needed to sleep.

Before we knew it, Max was up on the side of the tub, meowing at an illegal decibel when children are sleeping, desperate to get to me.

The laughter that erupted from my heart and soul was anything but romantic. I was laughing, which made me start coughing. Not just coughing, ahem. But coughing like you have some sort of lingering condition, coughing.

At this point Max was practically in the water.  Meowing, purring. and head butting the back of my head.

KSP laughed right along with me, and in that moment, there it was “Romance.”

Our romance is slightly different now. Of course, I still love little surprises and flowers and dinners out, but I also love the complete peace that we have. The comfort in knowing that we are together until the end. That we have been through more than I could have ever imagined in our 4 short married years and I could not be more grateful to be there., to be here.  To be in a bath, where, in our past lives, it would have been a different kind of romance. But now it was laughter and Max and meowing and sssshhhing and hoping that he didn’t wake our 2 precious angels sleeping next door.

A new kind of romance.

I will always romance “traditional” romance in some ways, but today, in this moment, I love the golden haze of romance that is in my home, with my KSP.

A new version of romance

I hope the today, you have some golden haze of romance. And if it’s not being presented to you, why not make it yourself?  It’s a lovely added feature and can certainly help make today ‘anewfavoriteday.’

What does romance mean to you?  Are you a hopeless romantic?  More pragmatic?  Does your routine meet your romance in the middle?

This week I am linking up with the wonderful “Lovelinks” Blog. It’s a great place. Thursday there is a vote, but just having the support and introduction to new and interesting writers is good enough for me!

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About Shannon Pruitt from 'Mynewfavoriteday'

Welcome to 'mynewfavoriteday,' I hope you will enjoy my take on motivation, inspiration and advocacy and will take the opportunity to tell us of your own thoughts and stories. Why I started 'mynewfavoriteday.' I am a childhood surviving, divorced, now happily married, IVF (and now natural pregnancy) success story, working mother of 2 amazing babies who were born 12 weeks premature. As life often seems to surprise you when you least expect it, we have now added another sweet baby girl M to our family in July. While our angel minis, Q and E are now 4 years old, our son, Q, has thrived while our daughter, E, has had a much more difficult journey. She is considered special needs and in September of 2012 was diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder called Angelman Syndrome. And so, as she has grown, so do we as individuals and as family. How to help her, how to celebrate our differences while allowing ourselves to cope with the challenges that we never knew to expect. Thus, while much of this blog is based on our experiences (good and not-so-good), it is also based on how we must not let ourselves become victims of our circumstances but rather advocate in our own lives. A little bit about me and who I am. In my professional life I am a marketer in the Entertainment Industry; however, ‘mynewfavoriteday,’ was not born of entertainment or marketing but rather as a pathway to help myself and others as we try to define who we are as parents, family members, spouses, friends, colleagues and people. I believe in never judging a book by its cover. Every cover is different, and no matter what your cover looks like, you never know how someone's book is written. Like mine. From the outside, you might never know what truly makes me who I am or what I believe. This blog explores the pages on the inside of my book. My vulnerabilities, fears, happiness, and all my triggers through the lens of being grateful for all the amazing blessings I know I have received but sometimes forget in the challenges of daily life. Thanks again for dropping by. I hope you will come back, subscribe, comment, share, and/or just hang out and be inspired or motivated to make each day for yourself or someone else 'anewfavoriteday.' By being here, you have certainly helped to make it mine. xo, Shannon

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33 Comments on ““Romancing” Romance.”

  1. Broot Says:

    I was just thinking about some of these thoughts just the other day, actually. :) Great post! Thanks for visiting me on my SITS day! :)

    Reply

  2. Lisha Says:

    I definitely love the ‘practical romance’ of watching Mr. Wonderful do the dishes or letting me sleep that extra hour on weekends.

    Not to the exclusion of ‘romantic romance,’ but alongside it. Because the greatest gift I can give my children is a house full of love. Both kinds.

    Reply

  3. katy Says:

    I love love. And hollywood romance is overrated. This is the real stuff. A couple that laughs together is about as romantic as it gets. lovely post S.

    Reply

  4. January Says:

    I’m a total romantic…although I’m not into flowers anymore. I have 2 kids and a dog to take care of and flowers just adds one more pressure. One more thing to water so to speak. ;) I LOVE going out for dinner and having a romantic night away. We only get to do this about once a year on our anniversary but it means so much and we always have a wonderful time together. Right now with 2 little ones we take what we can get at home. Great post!

    Reply

    • Shannon Pruitt from 'Mynewfavoriteday' Says:

      LOL January, I love the enthusiasm. I feel the same way about flowers and then they get that foul smell when you don’t change the water enough! WE too celebrate our anniversary this way which is such a nice evening to reconnect but like you struggle to find the balance so our little homemade versions are perfect for us for now! Thanks for coming by…:)

      Reply

  5. Alex @ Raw Recovery Says:

    This is such a beautiful post, Shannon. I’m so happy to hear that you have some joy in your life and can find the beauty even in the small things, which are actually big things too.

    I’ve never really had a healthy romantic relationship but I hope to someday. Right now I’m focusing on being good to myself and for now that’s romantic enough :)

    Happy 2012!

    Reply

    • Shannon Pruitt from 'Mynewfavoriteday' Says:

      Thanks Alex. Yes, it is lovely to find the joy and I suppose that it’s own form of romance.

      It’s so great to focus on you and being healthy and happy with you! As you say it’s its own form or romance which is just perfect.:) Thanks for coming here, it’s nice to see you.

      Reply

  6. Laura@Catharsis Says:

    Ah, romance. In our busy lives, it’s easy to put it on the back burner. I confess, that’s what we’ve done. There comes a time when the golden haze of romance, however, must shine through. I like that golden haze. I’m going to reincarnate it. :-)

    Reply

    • Shannon Pruitt from 'Mynewfavoriteday' Says:

      I totally hear you…it’s so hard to “make” romance with minis, so little bits here and there are good…and even if you have to fake it till you make it, little bits now and then can work wonders. Good luck with your minis…it’s a lot of work!:) Thanks for coming over!

      Reply

  7. Alison@Mama Wants This Says:

    Oh-so-sweet! I can relate to the kind of new romance you write about. My husband brings home these gorgeous salted caramel macarons on occasion, just to surprise me because he knows I love them. That, to me, is our romance.

    Reply

  8. Andrea @ The Penny-Roach's Says:

    This is so true, and so sweet! Romance is definitely what you make it, especially once kids are in the house. Sometimes you just have to be creative :)

    Reply

  9. Jackie (@notwifezilla) Says:

    I do believe romance does change as our lives change. As we grow together we learn more and sometimes its those little things- Ben & Jerry’s ice cream, a back rub or waking up early with the kids to let me sleep that make all the difference and make me love him even more!

    Reply

  10. Leighann Says:

    This is gorgeous!
    You said it perfectly.
    There is still romance… it’s just different.
    Comforting, strong, solid, and there till the end.

    Reply

  11. Y'vonne Says:

    I love this story. Ours is more practical. Today I’m crazy about him because he took my car in for service and an executive wash then day three of our big boy at home not feeling well with him

    Reply

  12. Kindred Adventures Says:

    First of all… Congratulations on fitting in the tub with your husband! No way we could. I can imagine though how nice and relaxing that would be. It is funny how things change. And sometimes it is the simple times and time together that is the best. I LOVE the last picture. You can feel the warmth in this story! -LV

    Reply

    • Shannon Pruitt from 'Mynewfavoriteday' Says:

      LOL, thanks Laverne. We have a big tub! It seems these days the simple times are the best and it’s those times when it’s most warm and cozy in our relationship. I cannot figure out why for the life of me I can’t comment on your blog…it drives me crazy…not in a romantic way:)!

      Reply

  13. Sperk* Says:

    I had forgotten about romance. It’s actually an important aspect of life.

    Reply

  14. Sue (@SJM_CookiesMom) Says:

    Lovely piece, Shannon. Welcome to the Lovelinks crew! :) Yes, romance takes on a whole new meaning once kids enter the picture – it’s a richer picture with far more depth.

    Reply

  15. deborah l quinn Says:

    Romance. Hmm. I’ve heard of that, but after almost 15 years of wedded bliss (no, really, THE BEST YEARS OF MY LIFE. Or they will be when he gets his socks off the coffee table) … sometimes it’s hard to find those moments of remembering–oh, right, you’re that person whose touch used to make me tingle. The tingles are still there, but sometimes they’re hard to find under the grocery lists. Love this story–love that the cat wanted to remind you that it matters too!

    Reply

    • Shannon Pruitt from 'Mynewfavoriteday' Says:

      LOL, Thanks Deborah…I kind of feel that way a lot of the time…but four years and 20 lightyears later, it can still creep up on me:) Yes, the tingles are an excellent way to describe it…sometimes just dusting them off however you can is a good place to start, even when it’s with the cat!

      Reply

  16. chosenchaosblog Says:

    Coming home from yoga to a clean kitchen and quiet house… yes please. I love talking about love and marriages that work. We need more of it!

    Reply

  17. Heather Novak Says:

    What a GREAT POST! I can totally relate, celebrated our fifth anniv this weekend without our two littles under three. The dog named Steve in our case was the baby, now he is ridden by the baby. I too am appreciating different forms family romance takes. Thank you for the reminder of a date night IN. ONCE in the past few years John & I ate after kidlets went to bed…I made him Rachel Rays’ French Onion Dip pizza and wanted to REALLY enjoy it….it was so romantic and wonderful to eat together without our progeny. Maybe we should do it a bit more often…DUH.

    Reply

    • Shannon Pruitt from 'Mynewfavoriteday' Says:

      Happy Anniversary Heather! I have always wanted a dog named Steve or Jeff but love human dog names they are the best. That sounds like a perfectly lovely evening and it’s amazing how that can be so challenging to actually do. But little forms of romance can keep the big one alive, right?! Thanks for sharing:)

      Reply

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